Tiger, amateur golf, busters and haters.

We've been gone for a minute, doing a few things. But we are back with a few thoughts. Number one, golf.

The H Man and I recently competed in a little tourney hosted and put together by some good friends. I had been playing decently most of the year but I got to the tournament and.....choked, blew up, bombed. H managed to play some decent rounds and was actually in contention for the title but came up a few strokes short. He claims he hasn't been playing much this summer but I know him well enough to know that he has played more than he admitted.

My man Tiger Woods captured his 13th major and is hot on the tail of Jack Nicklaus to overtake his record 18 majors. TW is clearly the best golfer on the planet and probably in history. But until he gets his 18th major, there are some fools who insist on demeaning him, and not giving credit where credit is due. The top three who come to mind are: Sergio Garcia, the talented but unable to close, poor mannered, narcissistic, complaining, whining like a beeotch, Michelob sponsored Spaniard. Next, the clownish, disliked by all, foolish South African, Rory Sabattini, who thinks that Tiger is "as beatable as ever" but who has gotten smoked by TW in their last two rounds against each other by about 8 strokes per outing, I believe. And most recently, the journeyman, ugly shirt wearing, ugly wife having, redneck, Woody Austin, who despite losing to Tiger by a couple of strokes, believes he played better golf than Tiger in the championship. This fool actually stated that "I played better golf than Tiger on Friday, he just got the ball in the hole." For those of you who don't follow golf, let me just inform you: the object is to get to the ball in the hole with the fewest number of strokes. That's what TW does, year in and year out. Tiger's avg. score on tour is 68.04 and Woody's is 70.37. That equates to 2.33 strokes a day in Tiger's favor, which over the course of a four day tournament gives Tiger a 9.32 stroke advantage. Woody, check the numbers, player. Your comments regarding outplaying Tiger made you seem small, petty and just a little stupid. Nobody would recognize you in public except that you wear stupid shirts with a "Tabasco" logo. Tiger wears the Nike swoosh. Dude, you simply don't measure up. Take your check, thank God that you can play well enough to make a living, and don't criticize a legend.

Here are a few more "Woodyisms", things that only a fool could say:

Barkley was better than Jordan....he just didn't win any championships.

Frazier was better than Ali...........he just beat him one out of three.

I play better golf than Howard.............I just haven't beaten him yet.

Keith was a player...........he just chose not to get any play.

Phil Mickleson is the best...........the media just likes Tiger more.

Keith (last name omitted to protect his ego) was a friend of ours in college who had a girlfriend that everyone slept with....but him. Okay, that's harsh and not really true. Everyone didn't sleep with her: just his roommate. Keith fancied himself the "choosy lover." He only wanted the best. I guess the best never came along because I can't name one girl/woman he's ever been with intimately and in college, everybody knows who is getting some play and who isn't. The point I'm making is that you don't talk a game that you can't back up, whether it is golf, basketball, being a lover. Just let your actions speak for themselves.